Serious wine lovers travel the world to experience fine wines in their native terroir, but one destination stands proudly above all others, and it isn’t the Loire Valley, France. Welcome to Loire Alley, London.
In Loire Alley, true aficionados can bring the finest bottles of wine straight to their lips and tilt the bottom toward the moon whilst teetering back and forth like a tree in the wind.
Only in Loire Alley do the startling sounds of howling cats, bin lids and bottles smacking pavement mix effortlessly with explosive laughter and cries of soul-stirring anguish.
Where the flickering of gas lamps takes one’s mind back to a simpler, Dickensian time of unnecessary amputations done without anaesthesia, and wine made the old-fashioned way—with one’s shoeless feet.
Steps from the fetid Thames, Loire Alley was established just after Brits learnt what wine was, but the first few years were admittedly rough.
Such as the time when a very large vat burst, flooding the entire alley—wine enthusiasts lay prone, lapping wine from the gutter, weeping with happiness and sadness both.
Several people may have died that day from what was technically drowning, but we know the real cause of death: an abiding passion for everything Loire Alley, London represents.
Sadly, due to the frequent recurrence of such tragic events, the name of Loire Alley was changed, but the blue plaque remains to mark its storied history as the birthplace of the British wine industry. Just don't go looking for the plaque because people keep nicking it.
When your greatness is unquestioned, you don’t have to put on airs and faff about with your ridiculous wine terminology, spitting out perfectly drinkable wine like a ponce.
No, you pop your cork and you have your fun and you spit out loose teeth when necessary and you carry on. That's the way it's done in Loire Alley.
In that old indomitable spirit, we bring you exactly what the doctor ordered—premium Loire Alley, London wine bottle labels.
Now these labels allow you to instantly transform any bottle of wine (even the worst wine from the Loire Valley, France) into fine Loire Alley, London wine, thank you very much!
Just slap the easy-to-apply sticker over the label of your rubbish wine bottle, and bam, instant upgrade to a Loire Alley wine.
The recipient of your gift will be none the wiser and all the better for it—because hey, you just gave them a bottle of the classiest wine from the Loire Alley, London, and it don’t get better than that.
For the real aficionados out there, we offer a wide variety of Loire Alley, London merchandise so you can represent your high-class association with this place. We’re talking organic cotton aprons, unisex shirts, women's shirts, posters, journals, postcards, the whole bit. Fill your boots.
And there you have it. A bit of history and legacy with a touch of class. Part of the ol’ sales funnel as they say—and in Loire Alley, London, a funnel is precisely what one needs.
Cheers,
Jolly & Goode
Shop the Loire Alley, London collection.
